Stay-at-home mom books Europe trip to buy herself a $40k horse, husband suggests he and the kids join the vacation, she refuses: 'The kids might spook the horses'

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Sep 5, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

We're sure every mom dreams from time to time about going on a vacation away from her husband and kids. It doesn't mean she doesn't love them; it simply means that sometimes she needs a break, like every human does.

If you ask us, every mom deserves a few days away from her kids, except the mom in the story below. In her case, what she truly deserves is a therapy session to work through the problem she has with her family.

This mom never took a vacation with her husband and kids. She refuses to travel with them and even refuses to let them travel on their own. When she booked herself a trip to Europe, her husband suggested he and the kids tag along, or even go on their own vacation while she was away, but she rejected every suggestion he made.

When she later told her family about her plans, they decided to call her out for the way she was treating her husband and kids, which derailed the situation even further.

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  • All her husband wanted to do was take his kids on a nice vacation, with or without their mom, but now this dispute has taken over the entire family, and nobody knows what to do about it…

  • 01

    Update: AITA for suggesting my sister let her husband take the kids on vacation

    I posted a few weeks ago about my sister who won't take time off of work to go on vacation with her husband because she doesn't want them to have those memories without her.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10549029120
    via Barbara Olsen

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 03
    WELL some interesting developments have happened and this will be long. Background: My sister works but it's unpaid and part- time.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 04
    She helps out a family friend on their farm. This family friend has farm hands for manual labor, idk my sister's day to day tasks but she's described herself as being the emotional support human to the animals.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 05
    She started this job in 2021 after being a SAHM for around 6 years. She has a law degree but never practiced. Her husband has a high paying position at one of the big four.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 06
    I promise all of this is relevant. I came back from a short trip and brought some souvenirs for my nephews. I swung by their house Wednesday to drop them off.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 07
    My BIL and I chatted for a bit, mostly about my trip. He started talking about how he is going on a work trip and wishes my sister would go with him but that she won't take off of work.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 08
    I'm just nodding and saying things like "oh, interesting" and "huh" very noncommital because I'm not looking involved again.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 09
    Then he starts telling me about her new hobby that she's picked up because of work. Horseback riding. She wants a horse.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 10
    She is traveling to Europe in a few weeks with the family friend to buy a horse. Apparently all the best horses come from Europe?
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 11
    She's never expressed any interest in this before but I guess she's a horse-girl now. He said it's going to cost at least 40k to import this horse.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 12
    I'm absolutely dumbfounded by this. She won't travel with her husband and kids, she won't let him travel with the kids, but she'll go off to Europe to buy a horse.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 13
    Somehow my BIL is cool with bankrolling this. 40k is what most people make in a year! I'm not poor but I can't imagine spending that much money on anything other than a car, house, or medical bills.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 14
    Then my BIL starts telling me about how he wanted to take the kids somewhere while she's in Europe but she basically said no.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 15
    He had also suggested turning this into a family trip, they could all go, she could pick out a horse, and then explore a bit.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 16
    She nixed that too saying that she didn't want to have to worry about the kids while traveling, it would complicate the trip, and the kids might spook the horses.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 17
    So he suggested meeting there once she picked out a horse and they could stay there longer. She declined that too saying she would have to miss work.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 18
    My BIL was clearly frustrated and upset, I said maybe therapy would help but he said they're already in therapy.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 19
    There was a family get together today and my sister was excitedly telling us about her upcoming trip and the horses she's planning to look at.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 20
    Horse stalls in a horse riding school
    via FilippoBacci

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 21
    My mom asked her how her husband felt about all this and my sister said "I've decided to stop taking his feelings into account."
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 22
    My mom then pointed out that that probably isn't a good attitude to have towards your husband especially when he pays for everything she wants.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 23
    My sister said this was something she needed because she's so overwhelmed and stressed these days. My mom did not react well to this.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 24
    She raised her voice at my sister. She told her "I have no idea what you have to be stressed about.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 25
    Your husband pays for a housekeeper, he pays for a nanny, you don't need to worry about money, your work isn't mentally or physically taxing.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 26
    Your husband is an active father who pulls his weight. All I ever hear from you is complaints about how hard your life is."
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 27
    My sister got p ed and they were both yelling over each other. Thank God the kids were playing with their dad outside because my sister started saying how she regrets having children and that they've ruined her life.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 28
    I was shocked because her kids are smart, funny, well-behaved, mostly self- sufficient, and overall just great kids.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 29
    I also don't understand why she would oppose her husband traveling with just the kids if she regretted them. Wouldn't that give her time away from them?
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 30
    Anyway, the whole thing ended when my sister told my mom she's a narcissist, that it's her fault she's like this and that my mom hates seeing her happy.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 31
    My mom told my sister to get out of the house off her property immediately.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 32
    On her way out my sister said to me "you should have defended me but you just stood there. You're just as bad as mom." ?!
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 33
    I don't want to get involved in any of this drama but I'm not sure if I should give her husband a heads up about what she said about the kids.
    via Alternative_Meat_469
  • 34
    They're in therapy together, I assume this must be a topic they've discussed. Idk, it's all so strange, my sister isn't normally like this.
    via Alternative_Meat_469

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Tags

stay at home mom europe family drama aita kids mother siblings wife parenting husband aunt family sister trip women parents children Father vacation
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